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The best creepy campfire stories are always the ones that end with the words, "...And it’s all true, because I have the damned documentation here to prove it!" In that spirit, we've tracked down five of the creepiest tales and urban legends that really happened to real people, proving once and for all that nothing is more terrifying than everyday life. The Dead Body Under Your Freaking Matress
The Legend:
Now, there's no way that scenario is going to have a good ending. You're almost hoping at that point that it'll turn out the last guest just got drunk and pooped behind the headboard. But, no, the staff take off the matress and discover the couple has been sleeping over the rotting body of a dead girl who had been stuffed in the box spring.
The Truth:
It makes sense if you think about it. The closet and under the bed are the two most popular places to hide just about anything, so it's not surprising a hell of a lot of corpses end up there as well. In fact, the odds are pretty good that at least once a guy has killed a prostitute, tried to stuff her under the bed, only to find there was already a body there.
The strangest part isn't that the bodies wind up in such a terrible hiding place (killers often aren't the type to plan ahead). No, the strange thing is that in almost every story people will sleep part of, or in many cases, the entire night, on top of the corpse before reporting it. Most people we know will complain if they detect that someone might have smoked a cigarette in their room four months ago. Not these people, they slept inches above an oozing heap of rotting human flesh rather than inconvenience the hotel management by asking for a new room. Or, at least we hope sleeping is all they did on that bed. Oh, man, can you imagine dying and then the first thing that happens is some middle age couple starts porking over you? Ew. Hopefully they at least got a free continental breakfast out of the ordeal. The Funhouse Mummy
The Myth:
The Truth:
As they were moving aside a "hanging man" prop, they accidentally knocked off its arm and discovered human bones inside. Bionic, this poor sap wasn’t. The story gets stranger. The body was actually that of criminal mastermind Elmer McCurdy, who was killed in a shootout after robbing a train in 1911. The princely sum old Elmer got killed for? $46 (and two jugs of whiskey).
Think it can’t get any stranger? Oh, you naïve fool. After several years of raking in the nickels (how exactly these coins were retrieved after being dropped into the corpse’s mouth is something probably best left to the imagination) our enterprising undertaker’s scheme was ruined when McCurdy's brothers showed up to claim him. Of course, these guys weren’t his brothers at all, but wily carnival promoters. From that point on, McCurdy’s mummy went on a morbid mystery tour all around America, popping up at carnivals all over the country before finally coming to rest in Long Beach.
McCurdy is now buried in Oklahoma. Because McCurdy apparently had the most entertaining corpse in history, they prevented anyone else from taking him on tour by dumping concrete on top of the casket. No, really. The Curiously Realistic Decoration
The Legend:
The Truth:
Once again it's the lack of complaints from passers-by that amaze us. Even if the hanging thing wasn't a body, it was something that looked exactly like one and would be considered an extremely distasteful Halloween decoration (unless she put on a wacky witch's costume before doing the deed). With the political correctness these days, you'd have expected two special city council meetings and 30 letters to the editor within the first ten minutes of someone seeing it.
We can't help but wonder, if the person who eventually called the police hadn't bothered, how much longer would the body have hung there? This happened five days before Halloween. Add five days of decomposition to the equation and suddenly you have something a whole lot more terrifying. Also, did the woman plan this? She knew what time of year it was, and intentionally hung herself in a public place. Did she want her corpse to blend in with the bed sheet ghosts and stuffed witches around the neighborhood? If so, it sounds like she may have been a fascinating person. A Halloween Stunt Goes Wrong in the Least Surprising Way Possible
The Legend:
The Truth:
Yes, people have repeatedly tried to pull off an imitation hanging for a Halloween show, forgot to include the "imitation" part and went ahead and accidentally killed themselves. Yes, they were pretty much all teenage males.
Perhaps the saddest thing about the story was how completely unnecessary the whole thing was. Here’s a tip for anyone trying to thrill kids on Halloween in the future: You don’t need to hang yourself. Just give out full-sized chocolate bars instead of those not-so-fun "fun-sized" ones. We can guarantee the tykes will be talking about the house that gave out full-sized Snickers bars long after some life-risking stunt was forgotten.
The Legend:
The Truth:
Now, this may seem ridiculous, but keep in mind this was an era before doctors such as the esteemed Dr. Gregory House gained the ability to solve any ailment within 42 minutes. If you went to the doctor with the flu in those days, he’d likely cover you in leeches and prescribe you heroin to suppress your cough. Their only method for determining if a person had died was to lean over their face and scream "WAKE UP" over and over again. If you didn't react, they buried you. The concern over being buried alive back then was so real that the must-have hot-ticket item for the wealthy and paranoid were "safety coffins" that allowed those inside to signal to the outside world (usually by ringing a bell or raising some type of flag) should they awake 6-feet under. Though, answering that bell sounds like a good way to get ambushed by a zombie if you ask us.
Unfortunately safety coffins aren’t in vogue anymore, so if you’re at the cemetery and hear a muffled voice calling out "OK guys, joke’s over. Let me out!" it might be a good idea to inform someone with a shovel quickly. Of course, that last sentence was merely facetious, there’s no way something like this could still happen today. Uh, well, except for this story about a Venezuelan man waking up during his autopsy. On second thought, you might want to consider adding a line in your will that states you’re to be buried with a gas-powered auger in your casket when you go. Nathan Birch also writes the disgustingly cute webcomic Zoology. |
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At www.snopes.com you can read about several confirmed cases of dead folks in/under the bed. It's good reading, if you don't mind your flesh crawling. I always look under the bed in a hotel before I unpack.
DallasDeckard your comment made my day!
I am actually from Delaware from a few minutes away from where they found that poor woman, and none of us could believe it took as long as it did either. Her neighbors definitely should have noticed!!
"In the town of Frederica, Delaware, a 42-year-old woman, perhaps distraught by the fact that she lived in Delaware, hung herself from a tree near a busy road on a Tuesday night."
My dear, pictures are hung people and are HANGED.
Er... you may want to go with the electric version of the auger, unless you want to die of carbon monoxide poisoning or just plain asphyxiation from the gas-powered auger using all the available oxygen. Just a thought. Better yet, how about a flashlight and multiple copies of Cracked mags? That way you can commit suicide by overwhelming boredom. ;-)
my mudder and fadder inlaws were in da room next to a corpse stuffed inna box spring, and me wife and me was on da udder side uf da inlaws in vegass in 89,,, talking about phuckking up a vacation. But we got free rooms vouchers for da next trip... good ting dey tored down dat hotel before we went back
My mums ex boyfriend "accidentally" hung himself...while masturbating to her picture...not only did she tell me this at the ripe old age of 10, but she finished this lovely story with the phrase "Its just so sad.."......who wins the comments now?
My uncle was in a car crash and had lost so much blood his pulse was not detectable. They started an autopsy on him and he woke up. He literally has a scar from his collar bone to his belly button.
The coffins with the bells is where the term "saved by the bell" came from.
the safety coffins of the time are where the term dead ringers originates.
must admit, I did a very realistic dead body hanging from a tree in our front yard. It was a small town, and the only one to call the cops was a neighbor who felt Halloween was sinful (so we put the graveyard by her)
The best way to get the "hanging" effect on stage without accidentally killing anyone is to make a harness that stops the person from actually hanging, but as a safety precaution, glue the knot on the noose shut then cut the rope on the loop part just after the knot. reattach the loop with velcro, so if the harness fails, the loop will come apart and your victims feet will simply hit the floor. not so simple is how you play this off to the audience.
The dead body under the matress thing really freaks me out. I stayed at a hotel in Florida just a few months ago.
Can't blame me for being paranoid with how many times it's allegedly happened.
A man was buried alive in a small town on the south part of Brazil 10 years ago. I read about it back then (in a |serious" magazine, not a tabloid), it had a picture of the coffin with the poor man's arm standing out. See, we have plenty more than just football and samba to show to the world.
To the dead hooker under the bed:
You shouldn't have asked for so much damn money.
I meant, "Did ya'll ever SEE that American Idol contes...s**t. Never mind. Stupid joke anyway, and I ruined it!!!
Did ya'll ever that American Idol contestant who was Hung?
Im a sure as hell gonna be buried with a gas-powered auger when I go ut some 50-90 years from now...
Hah!
That's what you get for buying Tempur-Pedic, you snooty bastards.
Okay, our job kinda sucks.
Gay Sex Lube!
Too bad they don't have a "friends" application.
Brought to you by Mega Man and Viagra.
We'll stick to eating turkey and napping, thanks.
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dontbugme3
im pretty sure this story is actually old. go to http://stuffididlastnight.com for full details